“Where did everybody go? Twenty minutes ago we couldn’t sell fast enough and now there’s not a customer in sight”, said my uncle as he stood outside his ice cream shop.
My Uncle Rudy had a knack for taking an item and making it better. When a new frozen custard place opened up, Foster’s, most people thought that their product was delicious. Uncle Rudy? He thought he could do better and he did.
A little bit of this and little less of that and Rudy had a soft serve ice cream that was not just a little better, it was incredible.
“Open up a shop, Rudy” and he did about a six blocks from Foster’s.
Not much of a building, not much of a store but the soft serve product Rudy made had people lining up around the block.
“Hey, Rudy, what’s the name of your place?” they’d say between licks of their cones.
So while I filled cone after cone after cone Uncle Rudy went home and in about an hour came back with a sign that said, “Dairy Queen” which brought a cease and desist order in about twenty minutes.
More paint and it became “Dairy King” which took about 30 minutes for legal action.
Dairy Princess, no.
Dairy Prince, no.
Dairy Maid, no
Dairy Lass, no
Dairy Lad, no
Dairy Kid, no
Dairy Island, no
Dairy Duchess, no
Dairy Fairy, no
And so it went until the cost of sign paint was eating into the store’s profits. Rudy was getting frustrated and thought that maybe he would just have a “no-name” store but the city insisted on a name so back to work on a name while the lines got longer and longer.
Dairy Knight, no
Dairy Goddess, no
Dairy Lady, no
Dairy Clown, no
Dairy Queen Mother? no
Then, finally a name that stuck with no legal paperwork showing up. The problem was as soon as the sign went up the line of people waiting to get in disappeared.
“Where did everybody go?” Rudy asked as he looked up his latest sign. “My frozen custard is better than Foster’s”
“Maybe it’s your sign, Uncle Rudy, —-Dairy Foot?”