To serve you better

When I first read about a proposed increase in water rates I was outraged. It seemed like The Water Department, “Your City Water”, just took an increase.
That last increase was to be used to upgrade the system with a new filtration plant, new water lines and new meters which would reduce labor costs and help the department monitor usage to find leaks and “…move “Your City Water” into the twenty first century” and now they want more money?
But then I guess it was something that needed to be done after all the last major infrastructure improvements were made some fifty years ago and so alright the water is clear and I did get a notice a while ago about a slight water usage increase that let me know that the upstairs toilet was leaking.
But now I’m wondering whether all this water monitoring capability is a good thing. Maybe it’s gone too far. Yesterday I received a letter from Your City Water:
Dear Your City Water customer
As you know from the literature that we sent out about the recent improvements to the water system we now have the ability, using the new digital meters and computer algorithms, to analyze water usage in order to find and repair leaks in the system thereby cutting costs for you the consumer as we work to conserve water and protect the environment for everyone.
We have reviewed water usage for your residence at 1557 Oak Tree Avenue and have noticed a spike in water use over the last six months with most of the additional water being used between 11pm and 7:00 am. Our reports show regular nightly water flows of 1.4 gallons (indicating toilet usage) at 1:00, 2:30, 4:10, 5:30 and a double flush at 6:45 am every other day (all times +/- 15 minutes).
The gang down at Your City Water believes this frequent nighttime toilet usage may indicate that an elderly gentleman at your address has developed an enlarged prostate and recommends that he see his physician or health care provider as soon as possible. Also, someone at your residence might want to think about adding a prune or two to his or her diet.
Very truly yours,
Your City Water
Lou, Judy, Frank, Bernie and Cindy

That’s what I call service, maybe too much service. It’s a new day.

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